Pondering, Pontificating....What got me FAT in the first place??
Here I have been trying to lose weight for over a year now (or a lifetime, depending on how you define "trying"!), and despite lots of new methods and trying to change my behavior, I find I still end up doing the same damages that made me be fat in the first place!! It's time I took a good hard look at those things-I-do and ways-I-think to CHANGE THEM, instead of just the diet and workout habits. Changing the latter seems to be only temporary and subject to the whims and patterns of lifelong habits and ways of thinking---so I really need to work on the thinking, rather than the actions alone!
Here's a list to begin with: 1) Falling into addictions: I like one thing, so I'll keep going into a whole kick of it! E.g, pizza for a whole week, chinese food brought in succession, cigarettes when I used to smoke, croissants for breakfast everyday in the past, etc. etc.
2) Keep thinking about this food I want---keep indulging that thought, until I cave. Instead of firmly, unfalteringly saying "No"! "Non-negotiable!! No means NO"! kinda like to a child.
3) Can't stop at a bite...gotta have to finsh the whole box, plate, jar, etc...
4) Resisting the idea of going to the gym...even after all this time...the 30-60 mins spent there is a breeze, and not painful at all unlike how it USED to be!! So I really have to change this way of thinking and actually get excited and look forward to the time I get to go workout!!
5) self-sabotaging! My brain plays this little dance! Every time I take a forward step and see a little progress, I end up subconsciously doing something screwy so I'm set BACK TWO STEPS!!! I have to now learn to stay on top of these mind-games especially on the critical, vulnerable days when I do see a good result!! I have no idea how i managed to lose 30 pds despite this back-and-forth dance I have been playing all my life!!
More later...
NEW VARIABLES TO WATCH FOR AND CONTROL IN MARCH: A check list to daily check off the following (and do them no matter what, before going to sleep! All other entertainment or enjoyable stuff can wait until after!!) 1) Breakfast at home 2) vitamin pills 3) drinking 1 L of water in the morning (which will keep makign me drink more the rest of the day) 4) Eating my home-brought lunch at lunch-time at work 5) running 6) weights 7) Abs 8)cook dinner and pack lunch for the next day 9)8 hrs of writing 10) at least 5 hrs of sleep
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