|
Good morning. I am still alive and kicking. Still stressed but did okay with eating yesterday and so far today (though it is still early). Not much to say really ... it is what it is and eventually it will be different. FIL's health appears to be failing, he is retaining fluids and his oxygenation has decreased. Hubby is struggling with a host of emotions as you can well imagine. I have my own to deal with as well as the impact of his on me.
I am in the process of changing up my exercise routine a bit. I had gotten away from Pilates and am trying to alternate Pilates with the elliptical. I read about HIIT (high intensity interval training) and am trying to change my ellipitical workout to coincide with that approach. I don't know if it will make a difference in my weight but I do know it will likely make a differnce in my body. I know that the pilates helps with toning and firming.
I feel like I am slipping with my weight. I've not gained significantly but I am not maintaining as low as I was before. Everyone tells me I look great. However, I think I would like to weigh a little less and maintain at a lower weight. But, with everything that has been going on in my life these past months I feel stuck. I guess if I can avoid gaining weight and maintain where I am for now that is success. I am slightly frightened that I will slip into old, unhealthy habits and find myself right back where I started. I do not want to do that. I've done it so many times in my life. I find myself thinking 'what's the point', everything is so screwed up right now, what difference does it make if I look good. Of course I also have that voice in my head that says this is about me feeling good, being healthy, and I DO feel better overall. I deserve to feel good about me. That is the point.
And so on I go. I will be glad when this current crisis settles down and I feel more balanced, happier, more content. I really do want to just pull back, run away, hide under a rock, under the covers, in a vat of chocolate ... you get the point!! I can't of course. Life goes on and I know that how I feel is temporary. Just a difficult time right now.
I appreciate your cyber-hugs, encouragement, and most of all ... your understanding and companionship. Back to work I go ... I'd like to get at least one report done today before I go home. Take care. I will continue to practice kindness towards myself, especially right now, I need some kindness.
|
1170 千卡
|
脂肪: 30.45克 | 蛋白质: 79.22克 | 碳水物: 156.39克.
早餐: cracked wheat bread, large egg, butter, Lite Jarlsberg, water. 午餐: white turkey meat, Whole Wheat Sandwich Thins, Jarlsberg Lite. 晚餐: Healthy Choice Salisbury Steak. 小食/其他: Yoplait Yogurt Parfait, Laughing Cow Light Garlic & Herb, bagel thins. 更多的......
|
|
2701 千卡
|
运动:
普拉提健身操 - 50 分钟, 案头工作（例如办公室的工作，坐着） - 8 小时 和 55 分钟, 驾驶 - 2 小时, 休息 - 4 小时 和 15 分钟, 睡眠 - 8 小时. 更多的......
|
|
 评论
You must share your experience with you new exercise. Can't wait to hear more about it.
2010年05月20日 会员：: Deana Garcia
|
I'll keep you posted Deana ... I hope it makes a difference for me.
2010年05月20日 会员：: madaboutmoose
|
HIIT is a great idea. You will see the difference in no time. Stress affects your weight, there is no doubt about this. But I'm sure you'll do your best every day and you'll get where you want to be. (((hugs)))
2010年05月20日 会员：: jessyline
|
good luck with trying Hiit - I am waiting in the distance to hear how this works for everyone.
Stress makes us do some funny things now doesnt it? Moose, if you can maintain during such a stressful time, that is an accomplishment on its own. Dont guilt- you can maintain at a lower weight when the stresses subside;)
2010年05月20日 会员：: Baileyboo
|
I am so sorry to hear about FIL, hugs to you and the hub. I am in favor of the new HIIT workouts... I noticed you upped your blue bar. I hope that is not an added worry to your list. I know how you feel about wanting to be at the lower number and really, I think getting your mind back on you and focusing on the new workouts will be a great destressor for you. Just realize its a fine line (that fat vs life) and not to dwell on the fat. Focus on the good you have accomplish, know that last slip ups you didn't have FS, support, ME! LOL really you know how not to fall that far back. I believe you do!!
2010年05月20日 会员：: cindyshine
|
Cindy ... I did up my bar. It was a psychological thing and I can always move it back down. I don't think it really helped as much as I thought it might. I figured that since my range really hasn't been 175 to 185, more like 180 to 190 I would make the bar reflect that. But, I'm not married to the idea. I have missed you though ... don't stay away so long!!! I need you!! LOL!!! Life is just sort of tough right now ... the situation with my FIL makes me think more about the finality of life in general and specifically makes me begin to wonder what I will be facing with my own husband. I know. Not happy thoughts. And, I need to stay with NOW not the 'what if's' or in other words the future. BLAH. And, you'll love this ... I have ANOTHER bum tooth!! My new insurance year doesn't kick in until July 1st ... I'm pretty sure it is another root canal waiting to happen. Feel a little like Eeyore lately. Thanks for stopping by!!!
2010年05月20日 会员：: madaboutmoose
|
You definitely DO deserve to feel good about you. You have a nice, healthy approach to life, both mentally and physically. I wish I could be that balanced! Take care Moose! :)
2010年05月20日 会员：: Chris1979
|
Hi Moose! I can relate to what you are saying about worrying about maintaining. We have been up and down so many times before that we are always afraid we will go back there...but we are not going back there. We refuse. We are more aware now and we will nip it in the bud. We can do it! Another bum tooth..oh when it rains it pours...as Info says this too will pass. Have a great evening!
2010年05月20日 会员：: chattycathy1955
|
Finding happiness is like finding yourself. You don't find happiness, you make happiness. You choose happiness. Self-actualization is a process of discovering who you are, who you want to be and paving the way to happiness by doing what brings YOU the most meaning and contentment to your life over the long run. I so understand about finality in life. When I heard I had breast cancer, I thought I was going to have to write my epitaph. I just kept moving through the process and when I hit the lowest low, I decided that whether I have 2 months or 20 years, it was going to be the best. My mom died in November of 2002. In January of 2003, my first child died. In 2008, my Dad died. So Moose, I really understand how you and hubby are feeling. I HAD to be strong for me and the rest of my family. Slowly, I got better. Then in 2009 I learned of my own cancer. We have to lift ourself up, come back stronger and make whatever time we may have left healthy, sincere and loving. I am so sorry you are feeling so low. It takes a total commitment to get up and fight. I HAVE to lose the weight to live. We all need to maintain our weight, or get it down where it belongs to be healthy and live our lives to the fullest. THIS IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Be strong, we are women, hear us roar!!! Love ya Moose, have a wonderful relaxing night. You CAN do this!
2010年05月20日 会员：: The Next Number
|
I agree with Cindy--concentrating on a new exercise routine and taking the best possible care of yourself right now might be a good stress reliever and help take your mind off your FIL and related issues? A good friend of mine recently turned a corner on her emotional eating by focusing on taking good care of herself and looking at healthy eating as a gift, showing herself love, rather than a punishment type "have to" obligation. That may not help at all but thought I'd throw it out there. You'll get through this Moose. No doubt in my mind. I sent you a PM also if you don't get the notification for some reason--they seem to be messed up lately.
|
Focus on one thing at a time - I know I am trying to get through a though time also, and when I get onto FS I realize I am not alone in having "things" happen to me, around me, beyond my control. Hang in there and let's eat more vegetables! Let us know how the exercise goes!
2010年05月20日 会员：: abbadabba
|
Ah ... Abba ... vegetables?? What a novel idea!
2010年05月20日 会员：: madaboutmoose
|
I know, its sucks being so busy, it will end soon. fingers crossed. hm. about what you are going through... watching Grandma pass (i think we've talked about her), at the time, was the hardest thing. She lost her strength and will to live so very sudden, she gave up. We set up the living room w/ her bed and hospice and fam would visit, she would talk, sometimes. She struggled. In the end she went the most peaceful way to go, I think. I can really appreciate it now. So many lives can be taken unexpectedly and nothing can be said or planned...this way really made things different. There was time to plan, to cry and laugh, and LIVE, or just sit and wait. Its definately hard, but think of the blessing. Talk to your husband as much as you can, plan, laugh about the akwardness, why not? Heck he looks so good in the pics! No one can say for sure ---any ONE of us can go before he does. Right?
2010年05月21日 会员：: cindyshine
|
oh! come to my neck of the woods! dentist in mexico.... I paid a 1/3 of the price and they take my flex card!! woohoooo! (there is NO beach but there is good margaritas!) I'd love to be your tourist guide heehe!
2010年05月21日 会员：: cindyshine
|
I wish there was some way I could magically take away some of your stress! I'm keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. I can so relate to feeling stuck with the weight loss and not maintaining as low as before. Hang in there! (((((hugs))))
|
Cindy I think I might take a trip to your dentist. I'd probably save money even with the airfare. LOL. Moose, I am so sorry about your FIL. I remember when my grandfather died. It was the only time I saw my dad crying. It scared me. Now I realize how devastating it would be to lose a parent. About your weight. I think you should move the bar lower. Then you have something you're working towards. It might help with the floundering feeling. (If it makes you feel worse, you can always change it back.) It DOES make a difference--how you're eating and whether you're exercising. It will make you stronger and feel more positive. You KNOW this. Also, the alternating intensity training: Love it. I always feel good afterward. BOOO about your tooth. I have a false crown in my mouth, my dentist needs $1000 before he'll put the real one in. **SIGH**. Hoping the fake one lasts.
2010年05月21日 会员：: beets_yum
|
We won't let you go back into your old habits moose. Besides, those are just words of the moment and I'm pretty certain that you wouldn't allow that to happen. Sorry to hear about FIL, it isn't sounding very good. Also, you know very well that all of this health business, is not only about how you look but about how you feel as well. With all the issues you are facing, if you were in bad health, it could affect you severely. We all have our down days, without them there wouldn't be up days. Everything is fine and, as Glen said, you are in our thoughts and prayers.
2010年05月21日 会员：: information
|
Stressful times make staying on track SO difficult. Do the best you can under the circumstances. Like you said, just try to maintain and take the best care of yourself that you can possibly do! (((HUGS)))
|
|
|