I'm home from camp. I've had a week to relax and regroup. It's time to get back to business. I'm tired of this plateau and I know it's my fault. I haven't been religious about what I'm doing. I have to get back to weighing every day (yes, I don't get discouraged by the fluctuations and it helps keep me on track). I haven't entered my weights in my paper journals since I hit this plateau and I have to get back to doing that. I've grown really lax and I need to reassess what I'm doing. I'm eating to my present weight, not the weight I want to be. I'm not gaining, but I'm not losing either. Soooooooooo, today I get back on track and really start working at this again. I have just over 80 more lbs to lose. I know I can do it. I just have to get back on the program.
On that note, I also have to make a major attack on my house. It's really out of control and disgusting. (At least I don't feel that way about my weight!) I really believe the two go hand-in-hand. If I can get BOTH of them under control, I think the stress levels in my life will go down.
I haven't said much on here about my special needs daughter. My husband and I adopter her when I was 43. I had three grown children from a former marriage at this time. My youngest natural child was 15. We were in the delivery room with our adopted daughter and took her home from the hospital when she was 4 days old. Her birth mother was an intravenous cocaine user, alcoholic and pain med abuser. When Meg was 2, my husband left and I ended up single parenting her. It's been a bit of a nightmare. She is now 24. I have so much emotion and so much of the last 24 years invested in her. Last Monday, I took the last step to be legally free of her. I was her SSI and SS payee. She is very strong willed and was causing me major financial stress. Now, I can just love her and her beautiful children (who are all normal, by the way) and I am no longer legally liable. I'm almost 70. I just couldn't take the strain anymore. For those of you who adopted and don't have any natural children and may wonder if you would care as much about an adopted child as a biological child, I can tell you . . . there is absolutely no difference. I had my natural children first and I couldn't love Meg and her children more than I do.
So, here's to what's left of my future. I'm going to see what I can make of it from here.
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1755 千卡
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脂肪: 64.72克 | 蛋白质: 64.19克 | 碳水物: 249.80克.
早餐: Diet Cranberry Juice, Truvia, Brown Rice Farina, Smart Balance, Scrambled Egg, Fat Free Skim Milk, Coffee, Fasting Glucose - 98. 午餐: Split Pea Soup, Uncle Ben's Natural Whole Grain Brown Rice, Grape Tomatoes. 晚餐: Diced Tomatoes, Garbanzo Beans, Uncle Ben's Natural Brown Rice, Feta Cheese, Broccolli. 小食/其他: Magnum White Ice Cream Bar, Double Caramel Ice Cream Bar (Magnum). 更多的......
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![](https://m.ftscrt.com/static/images/box/membersicon.gif) 评论
Wow Johanne - that sounds like a really big step forward, and one that must be causing you some pain along with the freedom and joy and relief. Good luck with it. I bet it was time and I hope you make something peaceful and good out of the days ahead.
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Jo, you are an amazing woman.. I applaud you for being so open and honest. I am sure making the decision you made was not easy but it is the right one for you and yes now you can enjoy her and her children and give them all the love you can. I am sure your future will be filled with amazing adventures and lots of love.
2011年06月27日 会员:: pixidaisy
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How wonderful of you to adopt her..I can believe you can love a person
as if they are your own..I think your doing the right thing for you..
Your a strong person and a loving person. Thats why I care for you
so much...Have a lovely evening....Bren
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Johanne, I am so happy that you enjoyed your camping trip, were able to do your own thing, and that you maintained your weight while doing so...but as you say, it is time to get back at it. We all have those spells where we just kind of cruise, and I think it is healthy for uys! As for your daughter, I am so sorry that you are going through this, but I believe you are doing what is best for you and for your daughter. That being said, it must be so hard for you! You are a truly wonderful, caring lady! HUGS, my sweet friend, and know that I am so glad that you are my friend!
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Jo, you really do have a big heart. I bet it would be a treat to hang out with you over a nice cup of coffee. :)
2011年06月30日 会员:: cocobutt
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Sorry guys, I've had two days away from the house and just got home in time to catch up my food and exercise calendars and fall into bed. Z's, It was a big step forward, but a very scary one. The woman behind the counter at Social Security, with no real information on the case, made Meg her own payee, even though we went up to the office with a person who was willing to take it on. I think it will be a total calamity, but at least I can be an adviser now and not the constant bad guy. I feel horrible about it, but she will have to do without me sooner or later . . . sooner if I don't get rid of some of the stress.
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Pixi, I sure hope you're right. I would love to just have some peace. I have so many things I would like to do before I die and I would like for that to not be for awhile at least. LOL.
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Bren, I know it's the right decision for me. I just hope it's not a total catastrophe for her and the babies. I care for you too. I would love to be able to meet you some day. Hugs!!!
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Steph, the camping was SO MUCH FUN this year and the weather was just about perfect. I'm having a real hard time with cravings right now. I think it's the stress of letting go. I hope that will lessen with time and that the guilt I feel won't take me down. It may take awhile. I also love having you for a friend. It's funny how close you can feel to a person you only know online. You live close enough to get together some day! LOL!!!
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Coco, I don't know about the big heart. Right now it's feeling a bit broken. I would LOVE to share a cup of coffee with you. Wouldn't it be fun to have a get together with all of the people we've grown so close to on Fat Secret? We'd make a helluva group!
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